I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize