dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
We got so high we made milksteak
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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