just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize