I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
