pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
