I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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