Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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