VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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