so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
