You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize