So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize