All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
