just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
