Screwed.edu
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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