Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize