I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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