one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
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