And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
