if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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