she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
