I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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