i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize