he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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