you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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