Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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