if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
