Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
