Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize