Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Someone signed my nipple.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
