i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize