PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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