Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
