Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
So squirting runs in the family.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
