He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
