Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
