I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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