Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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