Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
