I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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