Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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