Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
