butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
