I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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