STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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