so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
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