How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
