feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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