im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
