Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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