We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
