I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
vagina is talking i cant
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
