kristin has been a bad kristin
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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